Sole Curious

Welcome to my Ask Dr. Sole weekly web column!

This is where I answer all your questions about men, dating, and Soleology.

I'm Donna Sozio author of Never Trust a Man in Alligator Loafers: What His Shoes Really Say About his True Love Potential.

In the book, I teach women to trust their "inner sole" instincts to read a man by his shoes to see if he's good dating material. I also teach men how to put their best foot forward... because women are looking at the shoes on their feet!

Q.

Dr. Sole,

I’m just starting to get into Soleology…so I would love to know if you think I’m on track or not.
In my opinion, the brand of the shoe is not the most important thing to look at because you might not always be able to tell…at least I wouldn’t be able to. I would prefer them to be more expensive because I think that’s classy but I assume the basic style and condition are more important?

If a guy has several different types of shoes (tevas, work & bad weather boots, nice-black-lace-up-pumas) that he wears frequently does that mean he is fickle or just sensible?
Do the shoes that a guy wears to work matter? If he has to wear a shirt and tie or a suit then he doesn’t really have many options for shoes. He could have the ugliest, smelly shoes at home that he puts on right after work. Is the type of shoe a guy wears to work an accurate depiction of his sole?

Thanks and I love the whole idea! Hopefully it will make my life much simpler.

From,

Sole Curious

A.

Dear Sole Curious,

You got it going on. It’s not necessarily the brand of the show but more importantly the qualities that his shoes express. Sometimes certain brands carry a recognized prestige or reputation (like Prada or Converse) that men want to be associated with. In that case – the brand does matter.

Beyond brand, being aware of the care and attention a man gives his shoes indicates his habits towards maintenance in romantic relationships because how a man does one thing is generally how he does all things. Honestly, if a man doesn’t take care of his own things (i.e.: his shoes) chances are he doesn’t have the awareness to take good care of you in the relationship either.

Next, if a man has an assortment of shoes for different conditions and situations in life that is a good indicator that he doesn’t take a “one size fits all” approach to life. He has the ability to recognize the needs of each situation and respond to it effectively through his specific choice in shoes. This will “trickle down” to his behavior in a relationship with you. Which in this case is a good thing.

Now let’s talk about men’s office shoes. Sometimes it’s difficult to lift information from a man’s typical black suit shoes. They can be as uncommunicative as puffy white sneakers because they are obligatory. Yes, it’s a good idea to do Sole Reconnaissance and see what shoes he chooses to wear after work – when he is in complete control about his choice in shoes. That will give you more detailed information about him.

Yours,

Dr. Sole